Research by scientists from the University of Birmingham showed that music is a useful aid in performing monotonous work. Whether it’s mindlessly checking emails or filling out a spreadsheet, having music can help you get things done faster.

If it comes to intricate, creative, intellectual work that requires the brain’s active participation, then any music will no longer work. This requires a particular playlist.

Sounds of nature

Recent research by scientists from the Rensselaer Polytechnic showed that the presence of “natural elements” in music enhances the general mood and helps concentrate.

Sounds of nature, like white noise, well mask human speech, to which we are easily distracted, and positively affect cognitive function and concentration. Thanks to the natural sounds, the overall satisfaction of the test subjects grew steadily during work.

By the way, in addition to the chirping of birds and the sounds of rain, which are most often associated with natural ones, the stream’s murmur also causes a beneficial effect. According to the same studies, the noise of a mountain stream also belongs to attention-enhancing sounds.

It doesn’t matter if you listen to a recording of exclusively nature sounds or turn on music containing these elements: both options will positively affect.

Finding the sounds of nature is quite simple by the corresponding request, for example, on YouTube.

Favorite songs

Each of us has a certain number of tracks that we like more than others. Making such a playlist is useful because it is the music we love that helps many of us work better. This is the conclusion reached by Teresa Lesiuk, who works as part of the music therapy program at the University of Miami:

“Stress forces us to make hasty decisions, and the area of ​​attention is significantly reduced. Improving the mood through music allows you to look at things more broadly and consider more options. “

Interestingly, favorite music has the greatest effect in cases when a person has not yet become a pro in his work: listening to his favorite songs allowed such subjects to complete tasks faster and generate better ideas.

Music you don’t care about

The perception of the environment changes from person to person. This is confirmed by research by a Taiwanese university. When listening to the most and least attractive music for them, a certain number of people react with a decrease in concentration. This is just the case when, having heard your favorite track, you forget about everything and ultimately go into it. If you observe a similar reaction to your favorite and hated music, then include the most neutral compositions that do not evoke expressed emotions.

Instrumental music

Words are distracting. According to Cambridge Sound Management research, you cannot blame the overall noise performance for the performance drop. It is the words that distract us because a person, hearing speech, inevitably switches from the current activity and begins to listen to the conversation topic. This is our social nature, and 48% of the subjects were exposed to this phenomenon.

We can be distracted by any spoken words, regardless of whether we hear them in an office noise or a song playing on headphones. Have you noticed how sometimes you find yourself listening to the text of a track? This is precisely the case. Instrumental music will help those who are prone to sticking to lyrics. No words, no distraction.

Baroque music

The effect of listening to music depends on its tempo. Canadian researchers found that subjects do better on IQ tests with more dynamic music, and Baroque music is a favorite. Groups of researchers reached the same conclusion from the University and Hospital of Baltimore, and the University of Philadelphia. Baroque music helps you work better.

Another study by scientists from the Malaysian College of Engineering found a noticeable reduction in Stress and physical relaxation signs when listening to music at a tempo in the region of 60 beats per minute. In the musical vocabulary, the term “larghetto” roughly corresponds to this tempo.

Average volume

The ideal volume is medium. This conclusion was reached scientists from four universities at once: studies have revealed a positive effect of listening to music at a moderate volume on creative thinking.

According to these studies, both moderate and loud music help abstract thinking, but excessive volume interferes with the brain’s information processing.

You can also read:

10 Tips to Stay Focused on Your Work

5 Weird Yet Scientific Ways to Have a Better Focus

Single-tasking

First rule: Concentrate on one thing only. We are all often distracted because modern society has unrealistic expectations of us. They want us to consume oceans of information without stopping. We must be constantly available to her. Many are responding to this alarming increase in demands by focusing on multiple tasks at once. And this approach does not do us good.

We suffer from a fundamentally incorrect stereotype: they say, it is necessary to do several things at the same time in order to cope with the burden of modern problems. But multitasking tactics are usually confusing.

It’s hard for us to concentrate. Our attention is scattered. We become impolite. Our productivity is declining. We are losing control over the surrounding reality. We pretend to be doing a lot. Why are we pretending? Because our brains are incapable of fully working on more than one task at a time. Any neurophysiologist will confirm this.

“Here and now”

Senseless worries about the events that have already taken place or groundless worries about the future are the main and tireless plunderers of our time. We also get in the way of thoughts about what others will say.

The first step towards overcoming all of these obstacles is to achieve full awareness. Notice to yourself what your thoughts revolve around. Is this some kind of specific “splinter” from the past? Or have you formed a habit of worrying about the twists and turns that may await you in the future?

Remind yourself that such thoughts are not only useless, but also counterproductive: they prevent us from being present “here and now.” We are unable to change the past, predict the future, or establish control over other people. At this particular moment, we can only focus on solving a specific problem, which will make a positive contribution to our life, our work and the reality that rages around us.

To-do lists

When we try to remember all the things that we have to do in the foreseeable future, this often turns into an additional stressful load. But if we put the list of tasks on paper, then we take off the burden of fears that we might forget something.

A person is able to simultaneously keep in memory 7-9 cases. Making a list frees up mental resources so that you can focus on one specific task and not be distracted by worrying thoughts about other responsibilities.

By using lists, we can sort and structure a seemingly overwhelming mountain of tasks, focus on the most relevant one, and maximize efficiency.

The ugliest frog

Mark Twain once said that if you eat a frog in the morning, the rest of the day promises to be wonderful, since the worst for today is over. Your “frog” is your biggest and most important job, the one that you most often put off. However, it is she who at the moment will positively affect your achievements, and most importantly, your life.

The first rule of eating frogs: of the two suggested, you should start with the nastiest.

In other words, if you have two important jobs to do, start with the larger, more complex, and most important. Train yourself to get down to business without delay, to bring it to the end, and only then move on to another.

“25 minutes”

To reduce the temptation to postpone a task, each active phase of the project should take no more than 25 minutes.

This technique involves breaking the task into  25-minute periods, the completion of which is tracked by a timer. Each such period is followed by a short break. After four periods of work, a longer break follows.

The technique is especially effective when you need to do something you don’t want to do at all. When we know that we will work on a task for 25 minutes, and as soon as the timer rings, we can distract ourselves, it becomes psychologically easier to do the work.

Distractions

You must create a positive work environment for yourself that is conducive to being productive. Eliminate all possible interference. If you are having a hard time working on a project or task, distractions are just excuses for you to stop.

The internet, chatting colleagues, phone calls, pop-up e-mail notifications all contribute to putting you off work. Eliminate all distractions for at least 25 minutes and get busy.

How to talk to colleagues

In most work teams, it is impossible not to be distracted. It’s hard to get back on track if the conversation you were interrupted is out of control and you don’t know when it’s over. Therefore, you must immediately set the time frame. The best way to do this is to announce what you are currently doing to the person heading towards you, and then ask targeted questions. Here are some examples:

“I’m just trying to clear my mail. Are you visiting me for a little while or should you make an appointment for another time? “

“I have to make some phone calls. Do you want to discuss something specific or can we talk later? “

“I’m going to a meeting in about five minutes. Can you briefly tell me your problem in half a minute, or is it better if I call you after the meeting? “

The magic word “no”

Why do we agree to lunch with a friend when we are busy with an important project? Taking on additional responsibilities at the request of the boss, despite the fact that we were going to devote more time to the family? We come to the aid of a neighbour, even if it interferes with our plans? It’s simple: we are afraid to let people down or ruin relationships.

But we forget that we have a choice. You should not turn your own life into chaos, endlessly solving other people’s problems. Say no and people will start to value your time. And you don’t have to regret your pliability every time.

From now on, try to say no to all insignificant and “problematic” requests, and use the free time to complete a more important task. Refuse clearly but politely. “I’m flattered that you thought of me, but I’m afraid the download won’t allow” or “I’d really like to, but I’m awfully busy.” These forms of refusal will allow you to maintain a warm relationship with the interlocutor and get rid of unnecessary small tasks that “litter” your day.

Diversity

Doing the same thing day after day can get terribly boring. Tired of monotony, we start to get distracted at every opportunity. To avoid this, design different modes for different days of the week.

This is exactly what Jack Dorsey, the creator of Twitter, does. His every day has a specific theme. Monday is for meetings and company management. Tuesday is dedicated to product development. Wednesday is dedicated to marketing, communications and development, while Thursday is dedicated to communication with developers and partners. Friday is the day of the company and its culture.

This routine helps you stay calm in the midst of chaos. Every day, Dorsey focuses all her efforts on one topic, rather than spraying it over several tasks. His work week always follows these rules, so it is easy for colleagues and partners to adapt to him.

Checking mail

Schedule what time you open your email every day. For most people, the best option, least of all interfering with their workflow, is to check incoming mail four times a day and set aside no more than 15 minutes for each “session”.

1. First thing in the morning. Most people start their day by checking their emails to make sure they haven’t missed anything urgent.

2. Before lunch break. Lunch time is a natural pause in your business activity; to make this time more productive, you can check your email.

3. Mid-afternoon. This is another natural pause when you need to take a break or are about to leave for a business meeting.

4. End of the working day. If you free up the inbox folder as much as possible before leaving your workplace, then the next morning you will immediately go to viewing new messages.

You can also read:

11 Tips To Improve Your Memory

5 Weird Yet Scientific Ways to Have a Better Focus

The Internet is chock full of tips on how to focus when everything around distracts you. However, many of these tips are too far from reality. If possible, it disconnects you from the office routine (and then you begin to be distracted by the thought that perhaps you are missing something important).

How many of us enjoy working with headphones all day? Or not even once turn off the Internet altogether? Or maybe it’s that simple – “always treat your work as inspiring and fun.”

But perhaps the considerable part of such advice has a fragile connection with what modern psychology already knows about the human mind.

Much of what we thought should help us concentrate on work contradicts the normal functioning of our brains.

So, if there is a science about focus, then what does it offer us that is not on the Internet?

1. Disconnect from work

Are you having trouble concentrating on important work? This may seem contrary to common sense, but letting your brain shut off and wander aimlessly will do the most right thing.

More and more psychologists are coming to the realization that we all spend a very significant part of the day just dreaming and fantasizing aimlessly – by some estimates, about 50% of the time!

That prompted a number of psychologists to think that this is a wandering mind – as they say, “not a bug, but a feature”, not a malfunction in the brain, but an essential part of the system that helps our brain to function normally.

To understand why we are losing focus, look at how the brain works.

Concentration requires concerted action, networking between different areas of the brain. It has frontal cortex that controls unnecessary urges and distractions. It takes a lot of energy to keep this network functioning—more than the group of brain regions involved in our doing nothing like daydreaming.

Therefore, at one point in the working day, we inevitably slow down, and our mind starts to wander.

People who have the best concentration skills know how to turn off their brains when it does not affect work.

In this case, why not allocate time for this more consciously?

Paul Seli, a psychologist at Harvard University, makes a distinction between intentional and accidental “disconnection” of the brain. According to him, only those cases when it happens by accident are harmful to the case.

People who know how to turn off the brain at those moments when its participation is not required do a lot better. For example, when performing some kind of mechanical work – generally, they cope with tasks more successfully than those who give their brains the freedom to turn off and on.

“One can consciously turn off the brain if the given task is easy. Let your mind go where it wants, and this will not affect the result of the work,” says Seli. In his opinion, such deliberate shutdowns will only help at other moments of the working day, when a deep concentration is needed.

“Try thinking about irrelevant or different problems. And after a while return to your task,” the psychologist recommends.

Allowing yourself to switch off and daydream not only removes subconscious guilt but also gives your brain what it needs.

2. Fool around a bit

Funny videos with cats are often seen as the embodiment of distractions. Some psychologists believe that such videos just help us find the right mental state to successfully cope with work throughout the day.

The fact is that, no matter how much we love our work, we need a particular exertion of will. We need thoughts to stay concentrated on a complex task for a long time.

One of the best ways to use your mental reserves is to laugh heartily.

Recent study suggests that laughing heartily is the best way to preserve your thinking capacity. During the experiments, people who were given to watch a funny video worked longer and more thoroughly on solving an unanswered riddle. Comparatively the members of a control group didn’t perform well who were shown relaxing but not funny videos.

The researchers concluded that humour replenishes our reserves so expertly that we must create a more relaxed, fun atmosphere in the workplace.

David Chen suggests productivity can be raised exponentially by working in a fun environment. He is an Australian National University researcher in Canberra.

That’s not a signal to watch cat videos the whole day long. However, interruptions from time to time for a joke are very useful. Especially when you need a break from all the work.”

3. Try to make things worse

You need to remove external distractions if you wish to focus on the task.

In fact, according to one of the influential theories of attention, just the opposite is exact.

Nilli Lavie talked about load theory in 1995. The psychologist from University College London believed in the theory. It gave out a brief idea for the information quantity a human brain can take at a given time.

And when all the processing power is full, the brain’s attention system begins to choose what to focus on.

Levi’s experiments have shown that we seem to work more efficiently. Not at empty, clean tables and in complete silence, but disorder and chaos.

This is because when all the perception cells are full, the brain focuses all its energy on the essential task. Everything else is simply cut off.

The challenge with translating this idea into practice is to ensure that there are just the right amount of distractions and not overload it.

There are already dedicated mobile apps (like ommwriter or focus @ will) that can add visual or musical distractions at your request. However, none of them has been scientifically tested yet. Perhaps their benefits are no more than just turning on the radio.

The main thing here is to give your brain a sufficient load so that it does not have the ability and desire to look for stimuli elsewhere.

For most of us, it all comes down to trial and error. Since this method is quite tedious, we advise you to use it with caution – only when everyone else fails.

4. Stop working too much

When you urgently need to do something, then a break is the last thing that comes to your mind.

However, there is plenty of evidence that just a break will help you achieve more. The main thing is to decide precisely when to take the break, how much and how to spend it.

According to several studies, we can fully concentrate for no more than 90 minutes, and then we need a 15-minute break.

According to several studies conducted in the 1990s, our natural cycle of consciousness works. It lets us fully concentrate for no more than 90 minutes, and then we need a 15-minute break.

Other few studies suggest minimum break can work wonders even if it is just for a few seconds. It should work if it distracts completely from work for those few seconds. In the experiments, people were offered within a few seconds to do arithmetic. To occupy your mind with something much more intense than just looking out the window.

A break for exercise will be very beneficial for your brain. A cup of coffee will be an excellent addition to it before you sit down again for work.

Going for a run or just taking a walk in nature will certainly help your brain do better tasks that require a high degree of focus.

Another option is meditation. There is ample evidence that those who have learned to meditate can better control their attention and more accurately sense when to take a break.

If it seems to you that all of the above requires too much time, then here’s the good news: with or without exercises, a cup of strong coffee improves memory, reaction time, and attentiveness – albeit for a reasonably short time.

So whatever your break, be sure to pour yourself a coffee when you return to work.

5. Don’t stress too hard

If you are planning to concentrate for a long time, it’s better to take more breaks.

Mike Esterman and Joe Degutis concluded in their study from the Learning laboratory and Boston attention (Massachusetts, USA).

After conducting many experiments they found a formula to maintain concentration. It states one should work for a short time and then take a short break. If one tries to continue work for longer hours without any breaks, he is more prone to make errors.

The more we learn about how the brain functions, the better it is for us: stress is the biggest enemy of concentration.

Christian Olivers from the Free University of Amsterdam came to similar conclusions in his research. People’s attention reserve does not dry out longer if you ask them to be distracted from time to time. The same goes for when you ask them to think about something else instead of constant, uninterrupted concentration in action.

And this is probably the most important conclusion of all studies of the human ability to focus. It is important for us to know how the human brain works. And how the biggest enemy of focus and concentration is stress. So try to find time for those exercises or little tricks that will help you feel calmer and more confident in yourself. And you will succeed.

You can also read:

Lucy Palladino – Find Your Focus Zone: An Effective New Plan to Defeat Distraction and Overload

11 Tips To Improve Your Memory

Here are 11 tips to help improve your memory.

1. Eat Balanced Diet

You do not think that the car is able to drive with an empty fuel tank? Likewise, your brain cannot function at the optimal level without the necessary “fuel”.

By making three balanced meals a day, you give the brain what it needs: “fuel,” the right building material for optimal performance. This is the most basic thing you can do to develop memory.

2. Train Your Memory

Your body is the result of millions of years of evolution. To maintain the body in optimal condition, constant training is needed. Your distant ancestors did not lie all day on the couch.

Through training, you help your body and brain maintain the functions of all systems and organs at an optimal level. Through exercise, you improve the cardiovascular system, metabolism and the supply of nutrients to the brain. Physical activity provides a good night’s sleep and minimizes possible stress during the day. Maintaining a regime of physical activity, you keep a clear mind and remember everything you need

3. Get Enough Sleep

To make the most of your memorization skills, you must be calm and attentive. The main way to properly tune in to memory is to sleep enough.

With a lack of sleep, you will be unable to maintain the necessary concentration to encode what you want in your memory. Attention is the gateway to memory. If you are unable to maintain concentration, the gates will not open. Keep your gates open, relax and sleep enough

4. Extravagance

Any unusual, strange or absurd thing is remembered better than usual. For example, color and movement help to consolidate information in memory. It is much easier to remember the contents of the film than books, text underlined by colored lines than regular text. Come up with bright accessories – for example, put the ring on your other finger or tie a knot on the scarf.

5. Develop Attention Span

Attention is extremely important for memory. Concentrate to remember something. In the absence of attention, you will not be able to transfer short-term memories to long-term memory. Do everything you can to increase concentration. Do not engage in several tasks at the same time and do not jump from one activity to another.

Try to focus on some kind of activity, gradually increasing the duration.

6. Build Associative Relations

The brain consists of many systems that provide different ways of coding memories. Using several systems to encode information, you enrich your memory and facilitate the process of memorization.

The more ways you can remember something, the higher the chances that you will remember it.

For example, if you want to remember a certain car, pay attention to its brand, shape, color, smell, engine sound, as well as your feelings about driving this car. And then later you will easily remember him.

7. Imagine

Mental images play an important role in remembering information. The image is held in memory much better than the word. Therefore, visualization is used to memorize verbal material using the emotional component of visual associations.

8. Keep An Eye On The Context

As a rule, during the assimilation of information, the moment and place in which memorization takes place are also remembered. We all happened to greet a man on the street, although we could not remember how we knew him. To better remember, you need to associate the remembered with a specific context. Information learned in the context is better remembered if fragments of the context are present in the memory.

9. Add Some Stress

Did you know that stress stimulates your memory to work better. The reason lies in evolutionary development. It was life-threatening events that should have been remembered. In difficult conditions for life, everything happened at lightning speed, and only the fastest individuals who could remember this experience and accurately reproduce it with the necessary speed survived. This is also confirmed by the results of scientific research: the human brain instantly remembers the experience gained under stress and quickly reproduces it over time.

How to create this mild stress? Try to scare yourself a little or imagine that tomorrow you will have to pass the exam to a strict teacher.

10. Constantly Stimulate The Thought Process

For the development of memory, you need to constantly maintain the thought process in an active state. The lazy brain does not remember well.

No matter how old you are, always set yourself ambitious goals. In this case, the brain responds by forming more neural connections (via branches in the form of dendrites), and you remain attentive and involved in what is happening around.

11. Be Organized

Adhering to a certain order in your activity, you will better encode all the desired information into memories. Being organized does not mean being numb. This means distinguishing the experience gained and coding it into appropriate associative relations. Organize your life to gain the ability to remember.

You can also read:

Lucy Palladino – Find Your Focus Zone: An Effective New Plan to Defeat Distraction and Overload

“I Like to Win But I Like To Lose” – The Story Of A Man Who Challenged His Abilities

In the digital age, distractions lie in wait for us everywhere. According to a study at the University of California, the global stock of information is increasing by 30% annually. So, in 2002, 5 billion SMS were sent daily in the world, there were 20 thousand television channels producing more than 30 million hours of unique content per year. Free time and personal space have disappeared, the need for sleep and relaxation has increased, but their time has decreased, and caffeine and sugar have become the best friends of modern man.

Right now, focusing is more important than ever. Only by effectively managing your own attention can you achieve harmony and success in life. The book “Find Your Focus Zone: An Effective New Plan to Defeat Distraction and Overload ”offers effective ways

– fight against procrastination;
– reduction of emotional and mental stress;
– building trusting relationships with loved ones;
– gaining self-confidence;
– increasing the efficiency and productivity of labor.

1. Focus: 21st Century Issues

1.1. Concentration zone

The concentration zone is a relaxed-concentrated state when the muscles are relaxed, and the consciousness is maximally mobilized for a particular type of intellectual activity. Attention psychologists call this condition optimal arousal. In this state, you have adequate stimulation and the necessary level of adrenaline, you feel confident and focused.

It’s nice to be in the concentration zone, the nervous system remains in a level, quite excited state, you feel the strength in yourself and do things efficiently, are able to listen carefully, plan, make reasonable decisions and bring things to the end.

Inverted parabola has been used in psychological literature for 100 years. It demonstrates the Yerkes – Dodson law, which was deduced by American psychologists Robert Yerkes and John Dodson in 1908 to explain the results of their series of experiments. The law states that the result (in this case, attention) improves with increasing motivation (or arousal) to a certain limit. When the level of motivation becomes too high, the result worsens.

The top of the parabola is the peak state in which the ratio of excitement and attention is optimal. Zones of concentration differ depending on the type of activity: physical activity is characterized by a higher level of excitement, while mental activity requires more attention.

It is not easy to be in the concentration zone for a long time, but you can control this condition.

Step 1: Stop and realize that you have left the concentration zone.
Step 2: Choose one of eight strategies to cheer up or calm down.

1.2. Cognitive overload

Too much information flow and a constant change of activity leads to brain overload: it tries to save energy by slowing down work and decision making. However, this does not always work, and the system completely fails: you can no longer concentrate and make decisions or lose your temper. In any case, you move away from your concentration zone, where attention works best. The more personal time you spend on work, the more your family suffers. Constantly distracted, you have time even less. As a result, cognitive overload occurs.

1.3. Boredom

Boredom (or apathy) also interferes with concentration. Since the 1960s, the average duration of a news announcement has been reduced from forty-two seconds to eight. A modern viewer would fall asleep during a leisurely news broadcast of the time. If two or three decades ago, death in a television series made people startle, but now broadcasts about crimes, details of violence in the news and a sea of ​​blood in popular video games have become common. Today, a prime time series seems frivolous if no one dies in it. The word “sexy” used to describe a woman in a short dress or skinny jeans, then there appeared girls in bikini from “Rescue Malibu”, erotic music videos and half-naked beauties from an advertisement for lingerie. Our susceptibility to screen images and huge billboards, which until recently seemed provocative,

The previous generation could still sit still in one place for a while. Today, mouse clicks, remote access and multi-channel television have accelerated the familiar pace of life. It is necessary to remove special effects for a while, and we are overcome by boredom.

Apathy has become an epidemic . School teachers are not able to compete with the special effects that provide youth with the Internet, video games and television. On the one hand, apathy prevents children from assimilating material, while at the same time, fear of getting a bad grade does not allow them to concentrate during the test or an oral response. These two extremes prevent them from staying in the concentration zone for a long time.

2. Strategies for focusing

The author offers eight strategies that facilitate entry into the concentration zone and a long stay in it. Each strategy includes three techniques that reinforce emotional, mental, and behavioral skills. Some of them will be effective for you personally and will help develop your own strategy.

2.1. Strategies for Improving Emotional Skills

Emotional intelligence is the ability to be aware of your feelings and, as far as possible, to manage them for your own good. However, it happens that feelings control you and prevent you from staying in a zone of concentration. Usually people do not try to control their emotions, believing that this is impossible. By and large, it is, but feelings can be controlled indirectly. You cannot change the emotions themselves, but you are able to change the mindset that will affect perception.

Strategy 1. Identity

Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence, argued: “Self-awareness – understanding an existing feeling – is the foundation of emotional intelligence.” Self-awareness is not an easy skill. In the modern world, it is easy to lose yourself, constantly distracted by activities that provoke a large adrenaline rush , and forgetting that you need to focus on business. We unconsciously try to avoid unpleasant emotions, duties and relationships. At the same time, these feelings prevent the full use of the power of attention. The identity strategy consists of three important aspects: the ability to self-observe, assess adrenaline levels and answer the question “What am I not doing now?”.

Introspection. You work and suddenly hear a pleasant voice at the end of the corridor. You jump out of the chair and are ready to join the conversation, but stop and look inside yourself. Your internal observer notices that you are bored, but you must definitely finish the work today. By switching to self-observation mode, you have established a connection between the part of the brain that is responsible for the feelings and its thinking part. You have a choice: to make an effort on yourself and continue to work, or briefly distract and go to say hello to colleagues to cheer up and thereby stimulate yourself to further activities. If you just sit and listen to the conversation or impulsively join the conversation, you will certainly be late for home for dinner. However, if you turn on self-monitoring,

Assessment of adrenaline . Approximately evaluate your adrenaline level on a scale from 0 to 10, where 0 is a completely relaxed state, 5 is a relaxed-focused state, and 10 is an extreme stress. Depending on the type of activity in working order, the optimal level of adrenaline should be from 3 to 7. An indicator from 0 to 2 is good only if you are relaxing by the pool, and from 8 to 10 if you are playing for the NHL club. If you are not attracted to numbers, use your own visual images to assess the emotional state. Someone might imagine a boiling pot or a frantically spinning drum of a washing machine. One way or another, it is important to understand whether you need to calm down or, conversely, find a source of additional stimulation.

The question “What am I not doing right now?” . Often outside employment hides the avoidance of something unpleasant. Constantly ask yourself: “What am I not doing right now?” For example, if you always try to help others, does this mean that you are hiding from any problems in this way?

Strategy 2. Change of state

Sometimes you spend long hours at work, and work seems to stand still. In this case, a change of state is the best way to deal with routine and maintain concentration . The author offers three universal techniques for changing state: square breathing, restorative respite, and deliberate multitasking.

Breathing squared. Find with your eyes a rectangular object: a picture, a window or a door. Look at the upper left corner and inhale, and then count to four, look at the upper right corner, hold your breath and count to four, look at the lower right corner and exhale, counting to four, look at the lower left corner and say: ” Relaxed, smiled. ” If you rated your adrenaline level too low or too high, breathe in a square until you move at least 1 in the direction of improvement.

Recovery respite. Sometimes you are too wound up or you don’t have enough energy to concentrate. In this case, you can take a break by clearly defining how much it will last and what you will spend it on: you can drive a car, turn on loud music, lie on the floor and play with a dog, go to the nearest park, sit on a bench and watch the birds . Recovery respite differs from avoidance in that it is short-lived, and you will definitely return to work. Here are some tips to make this comeback enjoyable:

– Choose the business that you like best than the rest, and do it first.
– Grab something tasty at the workplace.
– Immediately plan the next break: when it will happen and how you will spend it.

Conscious multitasking. You begin to do several things at the same time, realizing that you are temporarily reducing productivity, but thus struggle with apathy: turn on the music, watch a funny video, read the mail. You need to do this purposefully and strategically, limiting yourself in time (five to ten minutes – and you return to the main task).

We often cannot physically get away from the stimulus or provocation, but try to run away mentally. The result is one of three conditions: procrastination, anxiety, and anger.

Strategy 3. Combating Procrastination

Pierce Steele published a paper in which he analyzed the problem of procrastination and found that it was becoming more widespread. If in 1978 only 5% of Americans considered themselves chronic procrastinators, then by 2006 the figure had grown to 26%. Dr. Steele also revealed the relationship of procrastination with the impulsiveness and distraction of a person. Modern technology creates an incredible temptation to put things off for later.

Another procrastination specialist, Jane Burka, names three main reasons for this phenomenon:

– fear of failure;
– fear of success;
– fear of being in control.

To overcome these fears, Ms. Palladino offers three tricks: develop confidence, light a fire and rewrite the past.

There are 2 ways to develop self-confidence:

1) Make yourself a success. Define the goals that you can achieve and the conditions for achieving them. What matters is progress, not perfection:

– divide the work into parts;
– outline a simple plan;
– include breaks and rewards in the plan;
– if you are at a dead end, break this stage into 2 parts;
– Do not criticize, but encourage yourself.

2) Praise yourself for your efforts, regardless of whether you have achieved success or not. Record one or more installations and carry with you:

– Appreciate your efforts: “I am proud to have this experience”;
– Do not strive for perfection: “I am not perfect, and I like it”;
– remind yourself that you can cope with discomfort for the sake of the goal: “This is not easy, but I am strong”;
– remember past successes: “I completed that project ahead of schedule!”;
– remind yourself that in any case you deserve respect: “Even if something did not work out, I am proud that I tried.”

To kindle a fire , you need to learn to treat the matter as something personal. Identify the reason why you are doing this and repeat it as a mantra when you don’t have enough stimulation: “earn money”, “be proud of your job”, “earn the boss’s approval”. It’s good to write motivating quotes on cards, for example: “Procrastination is the thief of time” (E. Young).

Sometimes procrastination has roots in the distant past: you put off things, fearing the punishment of your father, or pretended to be sick, so as not to write a test paper. It’s time to grow up, rewrite the past and change the usual pattern of behavior! Perform “mental training”, repeatedly returning to the past and imagining how you could change the situation by doing differently.

Strategy 4. Suppressing Anxiety

In an effort to keep our attention under control, excitement works against us. Anxiety reduces concentration, and distraction causes excitement. Everyone knows the situation: you were distracted and did not hear what they were talking about. From ignorance of what you missed, you feel the excitement, and it makes you even less collected. The anxiety suppression strategy consists of three techniques: realize reality, draw up a plan, and replace a thought.

First of all, you need to realize the reality of your fear, identifying its rational and irrational causes. Then you need to tell yourself that fear is normal for any person.

Once you have realized your fear, you need to draw up a short written plan to get out of the situation. For example, a person who is afraid of exams can write: 1) reduce pressure from the outside, 2) focus on learning, 3) mentally train how to behave during the exam. Then the plan can be supplemented by indicating the details of the work on the problem, writing down internal dialogs and techniques that can help.

Do not try to get rid of frightening thoughts. As soon as you forbid yourself to think about something, the thought becomes more intrusive. Better think about something else, replacing the frightening thought : do something that you like, and thoughts themselves will change direction.

Strategy 5. Tension Control

When a person is angry, it seems to him that he is focused as never before. In fact, he misses something important, hurts himself and offends others. The angrier you are, the more you justify your anger. If at the same time you argue with someone, then anger increases in both. The tension control strategy consists of three self-control techniques: cool down, detect fear, and insist.

If you hurt yourself, then apply ice to the sore spot in order to relieve pain and prevent inflammation. In case of emotional overstrain, it is also necessary to cool down, isolated from the source of irritation. This is the only way to reduce the level of adrenaline and return to a reasonable state. There are many ways to calm down, you just need to choose the one that suits you:

– slowly count to ten or quickly – from one hundred to zero;
– start humming your favorite song to yourself;
– squeeze your hands tightly and focus on how tense the fingers are;
– close your eyes and imagine yourself in your favorite place in nature;
– Remember what date is today and what did you eat yesterday for dinner.

If you are on the verge of collapse and are not able to think about something, just go to a deserted place (close in the car) and turn on the music.

Anger is a masked fear. When you cool down a bit, you can discover your fear . At work, people are usually afraid of losing money (they will not give a bonus), respect, time, status. When you are angry with a child, you are afraid for his safety, for the fact that he will not succeed or repeat your mistakes. Quarreling couples fear separation or loss of freedom. Recognizing fear helps you gain control of your situation.

Persistence should be in a certain pattern: admit the facts, evaluate your feelings, look at the situation through the eyes of the interlocutor and demand what you want, proposing specific solutions.

For example, you need to talk with a stubborn boss.

“There were difficulties in the project, and the price became higher than indicated in the commercial proposal.”

“It’s not easy for me to tell the client about this because I am interested in cooperation.”

“I understand that you consider this project promising.”

“Let’s get the meeting together and listen to the views of the members of the working group.”

2.2. Strategies for Improving Mental Skills

A mental skill is the ability to use one’s mindset to achieve a goal. Strategies 6 and 7 help to replace unnecessary thoughts with necessary ones and create sustainable motivation.

Strategy 6. Self-motivation

Achieving a long-term goal can be compared to a marathon. At the start, you are full of enthusiasm and energy, and when you see the finish, a second wind opens. However, most of the way you must convince yourself to continue running, despite fatigue and boredom. The author of the book offers three techniques for achieving personal victory: to set significant goals, to be self-confident and to periodically test oneself as a deathbed.

First of all, set significant goals that can truly captivate you.

Be confident in yourself.

– The goals set should depend on your efforts, and not on external circumstances that you cannot control.
– Determine exactly where you are going and when you plan to get there. Write down your plans, making them more tangible.
– Remember: the goal should guide you, not control you.
– When it becomes difficult: you do not have enough strength, time, you lose motivation, – imagine yourself in the form of a tall tree with powerful roots, which bends in a storm, but does not break.

The deathbed test is one of the most powerful motivating techniques. When you need to make an important decision, ask yourself the question: “If I remembered this moment on my deathbed, what decision would I praise myself for?”

Strategy 7. Following the course

To stay in the zone of concentration, you need a structure – a schedule, plans, task lists. Otherwise, you will either feel insecure (at one end of the inverted parabola graph), or you will be furious (at the other end). Setting a deadline may improve your attention for a short time, but overall you will be less focused. This strategy consists of three techniques: internal dialogue, attitude change, and mental training.

The internal dialogue helps guide oneself to accomplish tasks with the help of specially selected words and expressions, and there are five types:

– a list of three cases: simplify plans and highlight the main points;
– self-regulation: if you can’t forget about work, on the way home repeat many times: “I am at home”;
– anchors: remember past successes and people who believe in you – this will give you confidence;
– affirmations: focus on your abilities and strengths: “I can do everything”, “I can finish today”, “I am smart and quick-witted”;
– substitution of thought: an unnecessary thought – “I’m too tired to think”; a useful replacement is “Let’s see what I’m capable of, but if I get tired very much, take a short break.”

Changing attitudes involves rethinking the situation:

– get rid of the negative attitude to plans, schedules, alarms and organizers, perceive them as allies;
– leave the comfort zone to gain concentration;
– Do not be afraid to miss something important.

Mental training: conduct repeated rehearsals before an important event (exam, public speaking), and you will feel more confident when the “hour X” comes.

2.3. Behavioral Skills Strategy

Behavioral skills are regular actions that become habitual over time. Good habits help people to be more collected.

Strategy 8. Good habits

Do not rush yourself when you decide to change your lifestyle. New habits need time, perseverance, enthusiasm and self-forgiveness. Good habits are formed in three stages: calm and focused behavior; friendship with people who understand you, and liberation from unnecessary things in life.

To achieve calm and concentration, you need: good sleep, proper nutrition, sports, entertainment, relaxation and avoiding the abuse of stimulants (sugar, caffeine, alcohol).

To acquire and consolidate good habits, you need to communicate with the right people . We act on others and are influenced by them, therefore, if the lives of our friends are streamlined and structured, this will help us make our own lives more logical and measured. If you have a goal or project that needs a motivating push, call a friend with similar interests. The best way to find a friend who is ready to help is to become one yourself:

– regularly communicate with friends;
– tell them how much you value your friendship;
– be an attentive listener.

Extra things are distracting. However, the fear of loss makes it difficult to part with unnecessary things. Sometimes we cannot decide what is valuable and what is not. To disassemble the rubble and get rid of unnecessary trash, you need to think less about what you lose, and more about what you gain in return.

“When the workplace is in order, order is in my head.”

“I will find the necessary faster.”

“I like the feeling of freedom. I own things, not them. ”

3. Children and attention

3.1. How to teach children to be attentive

We cannot control our children, but we can teach them self-control. At different ages, children are taught self-control by various methods. Young children need simple, easy-to-understand rules: less explanation and more work. Make a simple diagram: depict the main responsibilities of the child in the pictures. Mark their implementation with stickers.

Teach your children self-discipline by following these guidelines:

Be a good role model.

Sarah studied poorly and could not do one type of activity for a long time. Her mother, Jackie, accustomed to living in multitasking, did not know what to do. The problem was solved when the woman began to find time to calmly deal with matters requiring concentration (paying bills, analyzing mail), while her daughter was doing homework.

Encourage mindfulness, not distraction.

When Sarah was asked a difficult task, Jackie washed the dishes, quietly following the actions of her daughter and encouraging her after each step: “You are doing well.” In high school, Sarah was already doing homework in her room, and Jackie would occasionally bring her an apple or lemonade, not forgetting to praise.

Teach your child concentration techniques. With your child, write down three techniques that are effective for him.

Set boundaries. The child should have a daily regimen corresponding to age norms, restrictions on nutrition, watching TV and using a computer.

Believe in your child. This creates the foundation for his future success. Learn how to respond to difficulties. If you get angry or lose your enthusiasm, remind yourself that your child’s childhood will pass very quickly. Leave negative emotions and enjoy these priceless moments. Appreciate yourself, your efforts and be proud of how you deal with parental responsibilities.

3.2. Attention deficit disorder

Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) is a relatively new diagnosis around which controversy continues. Even the name of the disease itself misleads us: in fact, people with this syndrome can be so concentrated at times that they don’t see anything around. However, they have difficulty managing their attention, it is difficult for them to prioritize, adapt to the rhythm of other people in joint activities and work at a steady pace.

Nevertheless, there are a number of hypotheses that ADD is not a disease and not a mental disorder, but an individual feature: such people have a highly developed orientational reflex, they are attracted to everything new, which helps them become brilliant researchers and successful entrepreneurs.

High school student Ben suffered from ADD. He studied poorly, and teachers considered him a bummer. In the summer, he went to China as part of a group of schoolchildren. While his classmates were weighed down by exotic realities and dined at McDonald’s, Ben immersed himself in the life and culture of China: he worked in the fields, ate with chopsticks, enjoyed tasting dishes from turtles and fish heads. He became a researcher: he studied the language and lived the life of a real Chinese.

If you or your child have ADD, you can make your life easier by observing the daily routine, eating balanced, and playing sports. In addition, getting ready for work, it is necessary to conduct an internal dialogue during which to recognize the problem and choose the appropriate strategy.

Recognize: “I am putting off work.” Use the strategy: “I plan more time for its implementation.”

Recognize: “I need additional stimulation.” Use the strategy: “I’ll go work out in a cafe.”

Admit: “I need silence.” Use the strategy: “I’ll go to work in the library.”

Conclusion

The book “Find Your Focus Zone: An Effective New Plan to Defeat Distraction and Overload” not only explains the origin of problems with concentration, but also offers effective methods to stop wasting time in vain, waiting for inspiration, and take action.

First of all, you need to learn how to find your zone of concentration – a relaxed-focused state in which the mind is as ready to do the job. Cognitive overload, boredom and external stimuli prevent us from staying in the concentration zone for a long time.

The author offers eight effective strategies to achieve and maintain maximum concentration: self-awareness, change of state, struggle with procrastination, suppression of anxiety, control of tension, self-motivation, following the course and good habits. Each strategy includes 3 techniques for reinforcing emotional, mental and behavioral skills, having carefully studied which you can develop your own strategy of concentration and effective activity.

Parents cannot constantly control their children, but their duty is to teach their son or daughter self-control. How well the child learns to concentrate attention depends on his success both in educational and professional activities, and in his personal life. Even children with attention deficit disorder can be taught to organize their life as efficiently as possible. Parents should be good role models, encourage mindfulness, teach a child concentration techniques, set clear boundaries and rules, and most importantly, believe in him.

You can also read:

“I Like to Win But I Like To Lose” – The Story Of A Man Who Challenged His Abilities

You Were Born Imperfect: Delusions In Which We Continue To Believe

History of the Conqueror of Everest

I grew up in a rural area where there were few people and went to school, where both teachers and parents of other children were typical hippies. I went to high school in a small town – but large enough so that social stereotypes were more pronounced, and the differences less acceptable. Until that moment, I did not even know that I was a shy child, an introvert who rarely understood other children; they, in turn, did not understand me. I saw a contrast between what was considered normal and abnormal. I belonged to the second group. The only interest I showed was my passion for mountain sports. At school, a song became very popular, which other students began to sing when they saw me approaching: “No, no, no, jumping from mountain to mountain, jumping over valleys, Kilian is already here, la-la-la-la-l- aaaaaa! ” They took the melody from the series, which seems to have been a television hit of those years.

I suspect that I started participating in competitions as a teenager because I needed recognition and was in search of myself. I had to navigate the map of life in order to understand who I was, and so that others would also understand it. Since I didn’t like to lose from childhood, shyness didn’t interfere – it even became an advantage in the fight, when I had to work hard.Competition was my way of saying: “Hey, I’m here! It’s me!”

In the early years, every victory came as a surprise and brought me inner satisfaction, because no one expected anything from me, and trying to compete here and there, I was just having fun. I myself did not notice how they began to invite me to the competition and ask me to progress. This is no longer a game. Fortunately, although my mother, who accompanied me everywhere, and my coaches rejoiced when I won the race, they practically did not attach importance to the results and did not build expectations. I think that was precisely their approach that saved me.

When I left adolescence, the need for recognition disappeared. I could stop competing because I already noticed how I dislike the aesthetics of the catwalks, the hierarchy of results, mythologization … But when you win relatively easily, it’s hard to refuse. It is rightly said: every victory feeds your euphoria, you feel strong and necessary. Who, having the opportunity to choose euphoria, will be content with simple happiness?

Finally, if I get down from the wave of sentiment, I see that they really give me the competition: they always set the task, make me doubt my abilities, and ask me if I am in good shape. I never know if I train hard enough; since I want to be the best version of myself, I search and analyze every little detail in order to progress, to push the limits of the possible further and further. When other famous athletes are waiting for you, it is easier to motivate yourself in hard training. What really stimulates me is an attempt to win competitions, in which I doubt as much as possible to win. Yes, of course, I like to win, but I like to lose.

I love being with new athletes, more motivated than me, better trained, more eager to get to know the world. Competing alongside them is recharging my batteries. I would like to know more about them, so that if I can, give them the heat in the fight. In general, competitions partly become a checklist, according to which I check whether I can maintain my level and whether my training and their changes bring the fruits that I expect. And one more detail: does anyone know a better way to practice wear and tear than participation in the World Cup, UTMB or Sierra Zenal?

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Every Moment Is A Choice – The Story Of Edith Eger, A Survivor In Concentration Camp

Socrates on Happiness

For starters – you need to learn how to calculate them. And then – start asking yourself questions. Many questions. Let’s try to figure out the first part of the plan together.

Inferiority Myth

The inferiority myth is familiar to almost everyone. And he sounds like this: “You were born imperfect, not good enough, with flaws.”

This setting is being promoted in many cultures. Somewhere they say that “you were born a girl, therefore you are imperfect.” Somewhere you are affected by caste, skin color, sexual orientation – whatever. The myth of inferiority can be imposed on us by society, or we can get it with genes when stories about our own unworthiness are imprinted in DNA, generation after generation.

But what does it really mean to live a life, thinking that you are not good enough? Often this thought turns us into chronic neurotics who are obsessed with themselves and the struggle for new habits in the hope of locating the Universe. We can feel alien and strange. We can succeed, but stumble on the last step. The inferiority myth constantly whispers to us that we are not worthy of rewards and other benefits.

There is a wonderful moment in the film “Servants” when the heroine of Viola Davis, Ebilin, a hired maid and nanny, hugs the daughter of her mistress (a notorious racist) and repeats: “You are kind, you are smart, you are priceless.” And the sweet little girl repeats after her: “You are kind, you are smart, you are priceless.” And this is the most beautiful sermon of the original virtue. And it is so necessary for each of us.You were born incredibly valuable. You have the right to everything. This is what is given to you. You are more than sufficient, you are significant. Worthy. Are strong.

The Myth Of Power

The myth of power is that “you need someone else to confirm your worth and approve your choice.” A myth used not only by politicians but also by the gurus of spiritual development.

The age of information has given us a sea of ​​opportunity. And endowed with unprecedented authority. Today, almost everyone can receive a certificate of any importance. Here are just a century of information – this is not a century of wisdom. The basis of wisdom is experience, the result of years lived and situations passed. Experience is gained, you have insights, insights – you become wiser. Just downloading a PDF file is not the same.

The truth remains the same: the only opinion that should matter to you is your own. Need some advice? Advise. Prefer fortune tellers? Go to them. But what about friends? Adore them. Well, real gurus? Respect them. The final word? Yours. Only yours.Try this philosophy: take what you want, and discard the rest.

Because there is not a single teacher and not a single teaching that could be trusted one hundred percent. No matter how deep their experience, it is based on the past. We cannot always look for precedents to project them into the future. It was them then, and it is you, here and now.

The Myth Of Belonging

The myth of belonging is: “Public opinion is true.” This is a by-product of the myth of power, which with the same success can be called the myth of its own steepness.

Sometimes we want to share something with a group of people. Go to personal growth training, stand in a circle and express what has been locked up for years. But some things are too intimate for conference rooms flooded with fluorescent lights. Something to be told only to a qualified psychologist or best friend in an intimate setting and when you are really ready – this is what really heals. They treat respect and professionalism, not manipulation.

Group is not bad. And there it’s kind of customary to share. We like to feel involved, even in bad company. It makes us feel comfortable. And the leaders help us find peace, albeit temporary, and as if they are doing our work for us. Group charm is extremely useful for defining one’s own boundaries. But then you should look for a place and people that you really need.

You can also read:

Every Moment Is A Choice – The Story Of Edith Eger, A Survivor In Concentration Camp

Specious Utilitarian Perfectionism

Many of us should work on this quality. But do not confuse it with bragging or arrogance: the desire to dominate others or prove to someone their importance, on the contrary, speaks of a lack of self-esteem.

The happiness of people with high self-esteem is to be themselves, and not better than someone; look worthy in their own eyes, and not seek the approval of others; objectively perceive reality, and not entertain yourself with illusions; trust your ability to think, study, make choices and make decisions, rather than go with the flow.

The famous Canadian-American psychotherapist Nathaniel Branden talks about these and other basics of self-esteem in The Six Pillars of Self- Esteem. We publish some useful tips from it to help you practice for building self-esteem.

Mindfulness practice

Almost all the great spiritual and philosophical traditions of the world in one form or another contain the idea that people spend their days as if in a dream. To get enlightenment, you need to wake up.

It is impossible to feel like a competent and worthy person, living in a “mental fog” and acting by inertia. Betray your mind and self-esteem will suffer.

The simplest example is an escape from unpleasant facts. “I know that I don’t put enough effort into my work, but I don’t want to think about it.” “What do you mean by saying that I drink too much?” I can stop at any moment. ” “Yes, I have problems in marriage, but perhaps they will be solved by themselves.”

Thousands of times making a choice between thinking and thoughtlessness, a responsible attitude to reality or running away from it, we form a sense of our personality.Self-esteem is our reputation in our own eyes.

Living consciously means using your mind; to seek the truth; see and understand what is happening in the surrounding reality; analyze your actions, goals and values. Moreover, it means acting on the basis of the conclusions made.

An exercise;

Some people should bring more awareness into the sphere of basic material needs. Others should focus on relationships. Still, others are on intellectual development, creativity or spiritual growth.

In which area are you doing the least satisfactory? What events and phenomena bring you painful sensations? Think about it, and then continue the sentence: “If I will be 5 percent more conscious in this area …”

Practice of self-acceptance

If you use the method of denial, then self-acceptance is a refusal to quarrel with oneself. Such a definition has three semantic levels.

1. In the most fundamental sense, “accepting yourself” means being on one’s side. This is a pre-rational, premoral act of self-affirmation – a kind of natural egoism, given from birth to every human being.“I will value myself, treat myself with respect and defend my right to exist” – this is the ground on which self-esteem is growing.

2. Self-acceptance is also a refusal to consider some part of yourself – your body, feelings, thoughts, actions, dreams – as something alien, “not-me”. This is a willingness to say about any emotion or behavior: “I do not necessarily love her or admire her, but still she is an expression of me.” It is the virtue of being realistic and the ability to stand firm in the presence of truth.

If you have committed an act for which you are ashamed, the fact remains: you have committed it. This is reality, and you should not try to deceive your mind. It is what it is.

3. At the third level, self-acceptance is associated with the concept of compassion. Suppose you have done what you regret, and now reproach yourself. Instead, try to understand what your motives were, what made you do this.

You can condemn the action you have committed and still treat yourself in a friendly manner, showing compassionate interest and drawing conclusions for the future.

By accepting yourself, you do not give up cultivation. On the contrary, self-acceptance is a necessary prerequisite for change, while negation dooms to stomp on the spot. After all, if you reject what is, where then can you find an incentive for improvement?

An exercise;

Continue the following suggestions:

• “Self-acceptance means to me …”
• “If I take more of my body …”
• “If I accept my conflicts more …”
• “If I accept my feelings more …”
• “If I accept my thoughts more …”
• “If I accept my actions more …”
• “If I accept my fears more …”
• “If I accept my pain more …”
• “If I accept my anger more …”
• “If I accept my joy more …”

Practice of responsibility

To feel worthy of happiness, a person needs to feel that he is in control of his existence. To do this, take responsibility for their own well-being.

Responsibility to yourself is expressed in the following forms.

1. I am responsible for the fulfillment of my desires.

2. I am responsible for my choice and my actions.

3. I am responsible for the level of awareness that I bring to my work.

4. I am responsible for the level of awareness that I bring into my relationship.

5. I am responsible for my behavior with other people: employees, colleagues, clients, spouse, children and friends.

6. I am responsible for how I manage my time.

7. I am responsible for my personal happiness.

8. I am responsible for the quality of my communication.

9. I am responsible for accepting and choosing the fundamental values ​​of my life.

10. I am responsible for enhancing my self-esteem.

Faced with a problem, people with self-responsibility ask: “What can I do about it? What are the opportunities for action open to me? ” If something went wrong, they try to understand: “What did I overlook? Where miscalculated? How to fix it?”. They do not blame anyone and do not seek excuses, but try to change the situation.

Passivity and high self-esteem are incompatible. Someone is encouraged by the thought: “If I sigh desperately, a miracle will somehow happen, someone will come to save me.” By deceiving yourself in this way, you will temporarily receive some reassurance, but in the end it will turn into unrealized opportunities, loss of self-esteem, irrevocable days, months and decades of life.

An exercise;

Continue the following suggestions:

• “Responsibility to myself means to me …”
• “If I accept 5 percent more responsibility for achieving my goals …”
• “If I take more responsibility for the success of my relationship …”
• “If I were 5 percent more responsible for my personal happiness …”
• “If I were 5 percent more responsible for the choice of friends …”
• “If I were 5 percent more responsible for the words I pronounce …”
• “If I accept responsibility for my current standard of living …”
• “If my life belongs to me …”

Self-affirmation practice

Self-affirmation is respect for one’s desires, needs, values ​​, and the search for appropriate forms of their manifestation in reality. And on the other end is cowardice, the essence of which is to avoid fighting someone whose views are different from yours, satisfy someone, flatter someone, manipulate someone or belong to a certain group.

Self-assertion does not mean belligerent behavior. It does not mean the need to break into the front ranks or knock anyone who gets caught off the road. It simply means a willingness to stand up for yourself, openly proclaim yourself to who you are, treat yourself with respect in any human relationship. Practicing self-affirmation means living truly, speaking, and acting based on one’s deepest beliefs and feelings.

Sometimes self-affirmation is manifested in the desire to voluntarily support a certain idea or to make a compliment, sometimes in polite silence talking about disagreement, sometimes in refusing to smile at a vulgar joke.

Everyman’s life is full of forgotten “acts of surrender”: somewhere he was silent, somewhere he lost to the aggressor, somewhere he went against his convictions. It must be remembered: suppressing self-expression, fearing to affirm the triumph of our own being, not defending our values, when necessary, we inflict wounds on our “I”.

Finally, self-affirmation implies a willingness to confront life’s challenges, rather than flee from them, and a desire for mastery. Discovering unexplored areas, solving complex problems, acquiring new skills, we increase self-esteem and build personal strength.

An exercise;

Continue the following suggestions:

• “Self-affirmation means to me …”
• “If I asserted myself today 5 percent more …”
• “If someone told me that my desires are important …”
• “If I was ready to say yes or no when I myself want it …”
• “If I were ready to voice my thoughts more often …”
• “If I let people hear my” inner music “…”
• “If I want to live a fuller life …”

Practice a purposeful life

Living aimlessly means giving yourself to the mercy of chance: sudden events, phone calls and meetings. External forces will shake us, like a leaf floating on the river.

To live purposefully means to concentrate your own forces to achieve your goals: to get an education, start a family, start your own business, bring a new product to the market, solve a scientific problem, build a summer house, and establish a happy romantic relationship.It is our goals that propel us forward, encourage us to use our abilities, energize our existence.

If we control our own lives, we need to know what we want and where we intend to come. The following questions must be asked: how do I imagine the big picture of my life? What do I want to achieve in five, ten, twenty years in the professional sense and in the field of personal relations? What are my intellectual and spiritual aspirations?

The practice of a focused life is associated with the following key points.

1. To consciously accept responsibility for determining their goals and objectives.

2. Do not forget to plan the actions necessary to achieve the goals.

3. Track your behavior and check it against the goals.

4. Pay attention to the result of actions taken to understand whether they lead to the desired goal.

5. Adjust the strategy if necessary.

By the way, let’s not forget that the concept of “achieving a goal” is not limited to mundane tasks. A life devoted to spiritual teaching or meditation is filled with its own meaning. But life without a goal can hardly be called worthy.

An exercise;

Continue the following suggestions:

• “For me, living purposefully means …”
• “If I live today 5 percent more purposefully …”
• “If I work at 5 percent more focused …”
• “If in communication I will be 5 percent more focused …”
• “If in a marriage I will behave 5 percent more purposefully …”
• “If in relation to my deepest aspirations I will be 5 percent more focused …”
• “If I take 5 percent more focused care of my needs …”

Walt Disney, Louis Vuitton, MaryKay and many other brands grew out of the hobby of their creators. A brand is much more than just a business. A brand is those emotions that a client experiences when he hears a brand name sees its logo, uses a product.

The techniques and exercises described below will help turn your talents into a real business and become stars of photography, fashion, confectionery or, for example, organizing celebrations for VIPs.

Ready to actively dream, outline a plan, choose a prize, celebrate a victory, and enjoy every moment?

Let’s start by searching for a calling.

Dream on!

• It is this formula that will help in determining the calling – the four components of a happy life:
• Formulate your dreams, understand what you want. The goldfish in your hands gives you the fulfilment of three wishes. Yours about what? (Dream).
• Find your favourite business. What activities does time fly by? What do you like to study? What could you do without payment, but simply because you like it? (Love).
• Understand what your talent and vocation are. Why are you praised? What have you been good at since childhood? (Talent).
• Endlessly give your talents and time and thank everyone who helps you along your path (Environment)

Brand matrix

Once you have found a vocation so that the business becomes recognizable and in demand, it needs to be developed and a brand created.

“Creating a creative brand that grew out of your hobbies is a pleasant job.”

Each brand has an emotional and functional side:

The functional side is the need your brand satisfies.

You need to start by understanding three things: Who are you? What is your product/service? Who is your customer?

The emotional side is what the client thinks/feels when using your product. In the creative business, it is the emotional side that gives much more value than the functional side. And to develop this site, it will help you.

Drama in business

Direct communication – think about how to make a lasting impression at the first meeting, to remind yourself beautifully, to sell effectively, etc. Think about how a person feels when you forgot it or vice versa when you got it with calls and SMS. How can you influence emotions and make them as positive as possible?

Make your joy, entertain, let them dream and be sad, make laugh, calm, make you think, touch … Produce a WOW-effect, use new spectacular technologies. Create a legend and use it to make contact with the audience.

Fill the elements of the show with each acquaintance with the audience and the presentation of your products. For example, Daria has branded flying saucers. At the beginning of the presentation, a legend is given that it is proved that the person who catches the plate catches not only it, but also the luck that will accompany it in everything. The hall instantly joins the game.

Plan to conquer the universe

Listen carefully, young Padawan, in order to conquer the universe, you need to do four things:

1. Be a master

Mastery is an understanding of processes from within.

What is one thing that you could do regularly but don’t do, that could lead to dramatic changes in your personal life or business? Do and be perfect. Think about what you can offer your client to be completely happy?

And may the Force be with you!

2. Find your ideal customer

The ideal “your” client is the audience for which your brand can bring maximum benefits. And you, in turn, can get the maximum profit from it.

Think about who your favourite customers are for the entire period of creativity, regardless of budgets and other factors? Who are the persons/companies that you want to get yourself?

Do not forget to take into account gender, age, marital status, profession, education, annual income, hobbies, favorite brands, lifestyle.

“Invest time in exploring customers and partners. When you know someone 100%, it’s easy to become the best of the best for him. ”

3. Open the backstage

Customers are interested in what is happening behind the curtain. Share success and cuisine – this increases the credibility of the brand, and also simply attracts the attention of people to your company:

• Show diplomas and certificates on your education and courses on the website and in social networks.
• Rejoice publicly when you or one of your employees achieves something significant. Any victory makes your brand stronger.
• Describe what your profession means to you.
• Tell stories about you, your ideas, dreams and force majeure that you encounter. Customers are interested in “live” brands.
• Add to the numbers emotions, sensations, stories. The number of hours / people / colors involved in creating the project. How much “thank you” you received this month.
• Tell us about your brand clients who you managed to work with.
• Keep a story and share memories with customers about where you started: first business cards, first commercial offers, first office, first project.

In 10–20 years or more, it will be a priceless archive that will show your growth, allow you to smile and be proud of yourself, your team, and success.

4. Speed ​​up your dreams

Think about what distracts you from fulfilling your dreams. Make a sign “Do not disturb! I create masterpieces! ” Do it!

Start today to improve the quality of your life, your business and the world around you – this is the very noble mission that Persons think about with a capital letter.

The article uses materials from the book  “Turn on the heart and brains . “

More in the book:

• How to generate business dreams by synthesizing your favourite hobbies. For example, if you like tea ceremonies and take good pictures, you can organize a photo cafe – a cozy place where you can spend time tasting fine varieties of tea and get an atmospheric photoshoot as a keepsake.
• Tactile, visual, sound meeting with the brand.
• Ten laws of the brand that will become very good helpers in building a successful and vibrant business.

Start today to improve the quality of your life, your business and the world around you.

You can also read:

Life Focused Through a Lens

Jazz: A Focus Wellness Ritual

She was 16 years old when she got to Auschwitz, and miraculously managed to survive. Torture, hunger, and the threat of death did not break her. Edith found a way to return to life, and then she dedicated her help to others, becoming a psychologist. Her findings — as a survivor and as a doctor — turn the soul and worldview overturned.

The story of Edith will not help to heal you (or anyone else). But it can support our Choice to destroy the limitations in our minds and take them apart by stone. You cannot change what happened – You cannot change what you have done. But you can choose how you live now. You can choose to be free!

You Can

I can not imagine a more meaningful message to our time. The book of Eger is a triumph, and everyone should read it for both inner freedom and the future of humankind.

-New York Times Book Review

In the book – the whole life of Edith Eger is shown before losses and after. An unfulfilled dream of becoming a ballerina, first love, hunger and Auschwitz, the release and birth of a child, many years of healing from a nightmare, friendship with Frankl, and the search for a calling – to heal others.

How great hopelessness is at the beginning, so great is the light at the end of this book.

Dr. Eger writes: “I often hear from my patients: “Now it’s challenging for me, but how can I complain? This is not Auschwitz. “But the hierarchy of suffering does not exist. There is nothing that makes my pain stronger or weaker than yours. Downplaying our pain, we do not give it a proper rating. We do not see any options. We continue to judge ourselves.”

I do not want you to hear my story and say: “My suffering is not so significant.” I want you to say: “If she could, I can too.”

Dance In Hell

It is a beautiful memoir on freedom by a Holocaust survivor turned clinical psychologist, reminiscent of the great works of Anne Frank and Viktor Frankl. Reading it gave me goosebumps.

-Adam Grant, New York Times Bestselling author GIVE AND TAKE and ORIGINALS and OPTION B.”

“You will draw all the emotions and forces in your life from the inside,” my choreographer told me. I did not understand what this means, and I did not understand before Auschwitz.” Here, Dr. Mengele, a sophisticated killer and art lover, combes the barracks in the evenings, looking for talented prisoners. 16-year-old Edith is forced to dance for him.

“During the dance, wisdom is revealed to me that I will never forget. She will save my life more than once. I saw that Dr. Mengele, a seasoned killer who only destroyed my mother this morning, was more miserable than me. He will have to live with what he has done. Finishing my dance, I pray, but not for myself. I pray for him. I pray that, for his good, he would not need to kill me … “

We can choose what the bad teaches us. To become embittered – or hold on to something childish in us, lively and challenging, for that part of us that is innocent.

Freedom

The story of Dr. Eger has changed me forever …

-Oprah Winfrey

When we are stuck in the past, endlessly repeating: “And why only did I go there and not here …”, “I married one and not another …” – we live in a prison that we build ourselves. When we are looking to the future, repeating: “I will not be happy until I finish university or buy a house” – we live in the same prison.

The only way to realize your freedom of Choice is to live in the present.

The ordinary course of days is also life. Why do we love extremes so much: either do we spend unthinkable efforts to feel alive or completely protect ourselves from any life sensations? Even the dullest moments of life make it possible to experience hope, spiritual uplift, happiness.

What Else Is In The Book?

It is difficult to talk about this book in such a way as to convey all the pain and depth. The story of Edith Eger is shocking, devastating – to then fill again. With light, gratitude, and the desire to feel like every day, every minute.

This story will forever remain in your heart.

This book is a message about hope and human capabilities. If your personal life is crumbling, if you are tired of work or if you are driven into a barbed wire of self-restraint, thanks to this book, you will begin to make the right Choice—the Choice to be happy and free regardless of circumstances.

Dr. Eger’s inspiring patient experiences and her own astounding story will teach each of us how to cure our lives.

Here’s what awaits you under the cover:

• “Your mother burns over there.” How to survive the worst losses
• Self-acceptance formula: I can do what I do and how I do
• Love in the face of war
• “Surviving the Survivor”: letters from Victor Frankl
• Patient stories Edith Eger
• The paradox of freedom: where to find hope and purpose

… 346 pages with a history of Choice that can lead a person from trauma to victory, from darkness to light, from imprisonment to liberation.

The Choice is one of the most influential books we have ever published. Of those that remind, why do we publish books and read them? Mostly to hear and tell such stories. This book is a story of the power of the human spirit. In a sense, everyone is a hostage to their consciousness. But we always have a choice.

Based on the materials of the book “The Choice.”

You can also read:

A Brief Discussion of Aristotelian Conception of Friendship

The Human Mind Works based on Basic Concepts, so What?

On the Mencian Conception of Innate Goodness, and Its Survivability